This Valentine's Day we asked mezzo-soprano Daniela Mack and tenor Alek Shrader about the joys and challenges of sharing their profession and their life — plus, top tips for long-lasting love.
Did music play a role in your love story?
Daniela: Our story doesn't exist without music. We met the summer of 2007 at Merola in San Francisco. I was Cenerentola (Cinderella) and he was Don Ramiro (Prince Charming) in Rossini's La Cenerentola. There were many moments of lingering embraces and excuses to make conversation during rehearsals. Our director insisted he created the chemistry between us, and our conductor still affectionately calls himself our "fairy godfather," but I'm pretty sure the chemistry was there regardless. After being counseled to avoid relationships with other musicians, and certainly other singers, plus the stigma of the summer "showmance," we remained smitten yet merely colleagues all through the final performance. Then, immediately after (and I do literally mean immediately — in the parking lot outside the theater), he asked me "to go steady."
What’s a hobby you enjoy together that has nothing to do with music?
We have little time for hobbies, but when our daughter gets older we hope to discover some. For now, we binge watch if we can and take advantage of the occasional date night. We both read (mostly bedtime stories lately). Coffee is a thing we get very excited about. When we’re on the road and something exciting is coming through town, we try to plan ahead for it (the last spur of the moment outing was a Ray Lamontagne concert, and next month will be Comic-Con while we’re both working in Seattle).
How do you get through long periods of separation when you’re both performing?
Whenever possible, we try to avoid being apart for very long. At the beginning of our careers, we spent several months apart with nothing but Skype and texts to connect us across several time zones. Alek was in Munich and I was in San Francisco, and we talked for a few minutes maybe twice a day. This was before we had iPhones and wifi became available everywhere! It’s impossible to share the details of your day with someone with so little time, and very difficult to feel really involved in the other’s daily routine. Now that we have a small daughter, we try to alternate who works as much as we can so that we keep our family unit together. We make our home together wherever we are!
How do you get through long periods of working closely together (if you do)?
We actually love to work together! Since we share a lot of the same repertoire, we are able to work on many of the same productions, which is incredibly lucky! We have very deliberately never thought of ourselves as a “package deal”, but since we do work well together, companies have felt comfortable accommodating that. It always helps to have that extra common ground and shared experience at the end of the day, and it’s a wonderful gift to be able to witness each other’s work so closely by being in rehearsals together.
What is your top tip for long-lasting love?
Make jokes. Have inside jokes just for your partner. It always feels good to know you are part of a special, exclusive team.